Backpacks, Buses, Bells... and Letting Go

There is something sacred about the beginning of a school year.

The sharpened pencils. The fresh notebooks. The new shoes. The excitement. The nerves.

And somewhere in the middle of all the back-to-school preparation is something we don't always acknowledge: the quiet work happening in the hearts of parents.

Whether you're walking your child into kindergarten for the very first time, dropping off a middle schooler who suddenly seems so grown up, sending a teenager off to another year of discovering who they are, or watching your college student drive away, every season asks something new of us.

It asks us to let go.

Not all at once- but little by little.

One school year at a time.

This past Sunday at my daughter's kindergarten promotion at church our children's director reminded me of this beautiful liturgy in Every Moment Holy, Volume 3 titled "A Liturgy for Dropping Off a Child at School."  One line has stayed with me:

"May this bittersweet pang point me toward a deeper truth... I am not the author of their story, Lord. You are."

What a profound reminder.

As parents, mentors, grandparents, teachers, and caregivers, we spend so much of our lives protecting, guiding, teaching, and preparing those entrusted to us. Yet every milestone quietly reminds us that our role has never been to control the story.

It has always been to faithfully walk alongside it.

The beginning of a school year often exposes the tension we carry.

We want our children to make good friends.

We want them to be included.

We hope they'll love their teachers.

We pray they'll be safe.

We hope they discover their gifts.

We wish we could shield them from disappointment, rejection, anxiety, loneliness, comparison, and failure.

But if we're honest, many of those things....heck most of those.... are simply beyond our control. Perhaps that's where trust begins. The liturgy gently reminds us that God's presence reaches places our hands never can. He walks hallways we will never walk. He sits beside them in classrooms we will never enter. He is present in every conversation, every challenge, every victory, and every disappointment.

What a relief.

And what a surrender.

At The Retreat House, we often encourage people to notice what is happening within them before rushing to solve what is happening around them. Back-to-school is no different.

If you find yourself feeling emotional this week, don't rush past it. Get curious and ask yourself:

Is it grief?

Pride?

Fear?

Excitement?

A reminder that your children are growing?

Perhaps all of the above.

Those emotions aren't problems to fix- they're invitations to pay attention to what matters most.

As your children settle into new routines this year, don't forget to care for your own heart as well.

Create space to pray.

Take a quiet walk.

Journal after drop-off.

Share coffee with another parent.

Come to a silent retreat.

Make that counseling appointment you've been putting off.

Remember that caring for yourself is one of the ways you care for your family.

Our prayer for every student, and every parent, is not for a year without challenges, but for hearts rooted in the love of God through every challenge they encounter.

May your children know they are deeply loved.

May they extend kindness to others.

May they grow in wisdom, courage, and compassion.

And may you find peace in knowing that the One who loves them even more than you do goes with them wherever this school year leads.

If you have children heading back to school this week, I highly encourage reading the full "A Liturgy for Dropping Off a Child at School" from Every Moment Holy, an excerpt is on our Instagram and our Tiktok. It is a beautiful prayer to return to throughout the year- a reminder that while we cannot hold our children every moment, God can. And this reminder from Deuteronomy:

"The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."— Deuteronomy 31:8 (NIV)

As we watch our children walk through school doors this year, may we remember that the first one to walk those halls is not our child- it is the Lord who goes before them.

Grace and peace to you as another school year begins.